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Ten

I sat down multiple times yesterday and tried to write this post.  I'm not sure why I am having such a hard time with it, but I am.  Jane turned ten yesterday.  Ten.  That's a big number.  And it's a little number, too.  It's a milestone for her and for me.  A whole decade of life.  Double digits.  And the realization that I have spent ten years being a mother.  It doesn't feel like a long time.  Say "ten years" aloud, though, and, yes, it is a long time.

I was twenty-eight when she was born.  And we had wanted a baby for awhile.  She was born four weeks early and was tiny.  Four pounds, thirteen ounces tiny.  Looking back, I had no idea how small she was.  I had no clue that the people around me were worried about her (and me, with pre-eclampsia).  I wasn't concerned a bit - just over the moon to have this little girl in my life.

She is still charming me daily, ten years later.  It's been an amazing journey full of laughs and tears and I feel that it has really just begun.  But at the same time, I am aware (so so aware) that she will fly out of our nest in less time than she has been in it.  That makes my heart skip a beat.  The years go by so fast - I want to hold on tightly and not let her go.  But I am also excited to see the young lady that she is growing into.  I know that she is going to be an amazingly wonderful person.

At ten, Jane is sensitive and kind.  She is friendly and social.  She likes talking to anyone about anything.  She is a talented artist and a wonderful performer.  She was super excited about her new guitar - I have a feeling they will be a very good match.  She loves to read and loves to draw.  She plays soccer and likes swimming, but has no interest in basketball.  She is dramatic.  All. The. Time.  She bugs her sister, but counts Kate among her best friends.  She has a winning smile and beautiful eyes.  She has her own ideas about fashion, still detests the color pink and her favorite shoes are red Converse high tops.  She is sweet to little kids (a future babysitter for sure) and wishes Scout would sleep on her bed.  She got her ears pierced on her birthday and amazed herself (and me) by not crying.  I have a feeling that she's going to keep amazing both of us for years to come.

Dec 2

Happy Birthday, Jane.  I can't wait to see you in another ten years.  I have no doubt that I will be just as proud of you then as I am now.

Comments

Jane

Happy Happy Birthday to Jane. She has a BIG personality and is a wonderful little girl! Enjoy all you can Momma, for the time does pass quickly.

martha

happy ten jane!
you sound like an amazing person. and you have an awesome mom:)

Kaye Prince

Happy tenth Birthday to Jane! She sounds like a very lovely young lady, and you must be very proud of her!

jenny

Okay now, this one made me cry. Happy B-day Jane!

Kirsten

Happy Birthday, Jane! You sound like just the sort of person I'd want my daughter to play with - which is a compliment.

Congrats, Erin - a decade of being a mom!

Jennifer

Happy Birthday Jane!

Tina

Double digits...that is such a milestone for the first child especially, and the mom. My youngest is now past that point. My how time flies...happy birthday to jane, she sounds like a wonderful girl!

Sarah Jackson

Happy birthday Jane!! And to you too, Erin. 10 years is a milestone indeed. The next few years is a balance between hanging on tight while simultaneously letting go, and it goes so fast. Enjoy every minute - even the tough minutes. You've brought an amazing person into the world. xoxo.

Mama Urchin

Wow, ten makes me catch my breath just a bit. Happy Birthday Jane!

Katie @ cakes, tea and dreams

Beautiful post. Happy birthday, Jane!

Ginger & Pickle

how wonderful! Happy Birthday! high ten!

anina

Happy Birthday to you and Jane!
Enjoy every minute because before you know it she'll be 16.

Naomi

I had to comment because I can resonate with your feeling about your daughter. You took my words right out of my mouth. It's amazing the love we have for our children. Happy Birthday Jane!

Tracy M

This is a favourite poem of mine by Penelope Shuttle. You made me think of it XX

Outgrown

It is both sad and a relief to fold so carefully
her outgrown clothes and line up the little worn shoes
of childhood, so prudent, scuffed and particular.
It is both happy and horrible to send them galloping
back tappity-tap along the misty chill path into the past.

It is both a freedom and a prison, to be outgrown
by her as she towers over me as thin as a sequin
in her doc martens and her pretty skirt,
because just as I work out how to be a mother
she stops being a child.

tanya

Beautiful girl - lovely cake - best wishes!!
I have a ten year old boy so I know how you feel. We actually celebrate half birthdays so on the first he was 10 1/2 - I think I had more problems with that than him turning just 10. LOL

Blessings,
Tanya

Shannon

Happy Birthday!!! TEN! That is a milestone!

marta

beautiful post. Ten is a true milestone for both of you. happy birthday jane!

Suzanne

What a beautiful tribute to your sweet daughter. Motherhood is full of dichotomies. I relate to so much of what you described -- except... my oldest is 31 and my youngest 20. (I also have 5 children in between those two!) Still, the feelings of a mother remain very much the same regardless of the age of the child! ;o} Happy birthday to your girl.

meg

well, that just made me cry.
happy birthday, sweet sweet jane!
and congrats to you, erin.
xoxo

julie

So sweet... Happy 10 to Jane!

beki

Such a sweet, thoughtful post, Erin. Happy Birthday to Jane!!

rachell

Our daughters have the same birthday. Mine just turned six. Congrats on a decade. It looks as though you're doing everything right. =-D

Audrie

That's a beautiful post :) Happy birthday Jane! Welcome to double digits! Hehe :)

Sarah

Your lovely post brought tears to my eyes-I have an 18 month old and wonder how she'll be at 10, or even how she'll be tomorrow ;)

Sarah Jane

I got a little teary!
You are such a good mom and she is such a good ten year old.
Happy day!

Dana

Yes, teary. I saw a lot of my own experiences in your words. We are 3 months from ten and it makes me want to put my head in the sand a little. How can it be 10 years already?

Happy birthday, sweet Jane! And congrats, Erin, for bringing such an obviously amazing person into the world.

erin

choking me up!!! i think about how fast time is flying in this house. i always heard seasoned parents say, "the time goes so quickly" and i never believed it when they were babies. it felt like they would be that little forever. now? i feel like i'm going to blink, and they'll be gone. in any case, i related to your sweet words about your daughter. Happy Birthday to Jane!!

Pam

happy birthday, jane! And Erin, that was a very beautiful post. I read somewhere once that motherhood is living with our hearts outside our bodies.

Kelly

Ten does seem big! Happy Birthday Jane!

betsy

Oh, E, wow! This made me cry. I love how you write about parenting with such honesty and love. Happy Birthday to your very sweet ten-year-old girl. And happy 10 years of mothering to you too!!! xoxo

Collins

Happy Birthday to your Jane, and congrats to you for being a mom for 10 years!
My daughter's birthday was yesterday too, she is 12.
Looks like Jane had a yummy and cute cake.

Sarah Bird

Beautiful girl and wonderful Mum! Congratulations on 10 years of Motherhood!

carol

Sounds like Jane didn't fall far from the Mommy tree. Happy day Jane!

kathryn

Happy Birthday Jane!! Ten is so fun--I'm sure it will be a wonderful year!!

rachel | buttons magee

Oh Jane! Happy happy birthday young lady. I know this is going to be a great year for you.

rhea

Happy Birthday, Jane!

10 is a BIG number, indeed.

I have a little sister who is 11.

She was born when I was 19 and I babysat her a lot (like, all-day and all night a lot), so everybody thought she was my baby.

It's amazing how much she has changed and how much she is still the same and how much I measure my life against hers.

I can't wait to have a little bodkin of my own and this post gave me happy-sad feelings that I know come with parenthood.

Thank you, Erin, for such a lovely post and Happy Birthday to your little girl.

XO,

Rhea

Suzanne

She is quite the girl. But then, look at what good stock she comes from. I bet she was sporting a fancy new shirt in honor of her day! Can't wait to see...

darlene

such a beautiful post.

jill

DeLurking to say Happy Birthday to Jane. My youngest is now ten. What a pivotal age. You will marvel all year long, mom!

michelle

um :tears:

you are such a great mother to your girls! so proud of them and supportive of their individuality. i hope i am that way with my girls. my maeve is 4 1/2 and fiona is 2 1/2...every day is a baby day gone. i envy you in a way...to have the {wonderful} experience under your belt, but i am holding on tight thanks to mama's like you who remind me to do so.

happy birthday, jane! 10 is an awesome age! {btw...fiona's middle name is jane:)}

Kim

What a touching bitterswett tribute to your daughter AND her MOM!

Grace

Aw, I have a lump in my throat. Happy 10, Jane. And happy 10 years of mothering, Erin! I have no doubt that you are one of the best mothers I know. xoxox

krburke@aol.com

Happy Birthday ERin and Jane. I always knew I had a beautiful daughter and reading the post confirms it.

Erin | house on hill road

Thanks Dad.

Sent from my iPhone

Tanya

My daughter turned 10 this summer. I had those same thoughts about having her time in the house being more than half over. :( But I too can't wait to see the woman she will turn out to be.

leslie

erin. i absolutely LOVE this post.
happy birthday to your sweet jane.
xx

amandajean

happy (belated) birthday to your beautiful girl!

Jenny

What a beautiful post about your daughter and motherhood. It brought tears to my eyes. Happy Birthday to your sweet daughter.

Tina

My daughter (and oldest child) turned 10 in July... I know exactly what you mean. So well.

tara thayer

erin, it really has just begun. your looking forward to the birthday ten years from now made me tear up.
they are good company, our daughters.
take it from me.
best wishes,
tara

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